How to be Ok (even when things don't feel ok)

How to be Ok (even when things don’t feel ok).

It is going to be ok…even though it hurts right now. YOU are going to be ok…even though you hurt right now. It’s okay not to be okay.

It might feel really raw, heavy, tense, somber, sad, painful, exhausting, overwhelming, scary, disheartening, hopeless…………………

Be with the feelings. All of them.

Be with the sensations. Don’t try to change them right now. Allow them to be what they are.

Allow yourself to be who you are, where you are, without resisting.

It doesn’t have to be ok right now.

You have nothing you need to fix or change right now.

Taking action can happen later. Being fully in “it” is the most courageous act of self-care you can give yourself in a time like this.

One our biggest challenges is “feeling all the feels” and how to be okay with yourself…because sometimes feeling that much at one time is uncomfortable. Our instinct is to:

Avoid

Run

Resist

Hide

Numb

Pretend

Deny

Suppress

When really the path toward deep, cellular level healing, requires that we work to allow ourselves to:

Feel

Experience

Allow

Receive

This is, by no means, easy. This is work. This is how you build resilience. This is the work of your journey.

This is how you live fully connected and heart-centered, with health and happiness.

Start by reminding yourself that it’s supposed to feel however it feels. Your feelings are valid no matter what they are. Sometimes it’s okay to not be okay. You don’t need a reason to feel what you feel. Remind yourself that you are human, that you have feelings, and that there’s no official “right way” to experience challenges or grieve losses.

Here are a few more MindBodyWise ways to tune-in and turn up the volume on “being,” without fixing. Allowing, without resisting. Living, without doing.

1) Close your eyes and feel your whole body, one part at a time, beginning with your toes and moving up your body, all the way to the crown of your head. Take time to “be with” each part. If you notice something itches or is uncomfortable, play with allowing it to be what it is – don’t scratch the itch, don’t fidget or adjust.

2) Bring your hands to your heart. Close your eyes. Take a breath. Ask your heart what it wants to say? Leave time, space, and quiet for your heart to speak to you. Listen. Allow.

3) When you notice any feeling bubbling up, try not to block it or swallow it. If you do block it, notice what happens in your body…see if you can identify where it went in your body. What sensations are arising in place of the emotion you resisted? Allow those to be what they are. Don’t change them. Simply bring your awareness to them.

4) Access your connection with yourself, developing compassion for yourself and all of humanity, by listening to this free, guided meditation called the Loving Kindness Meditation (Metta Meditation).

To all of the MindBodyWise Community, know that you are not alone in your pain. We all have pain. We all have feelings that are uncomfortable. I am here for you if/when you are ready to process these feelings, sensations and heart whispers.